Nice Guys Finish Last


A wise man once told me, “As a man, you have to die once in order to live.” I never fully appreciated his advice, nor did I understand it until I experienced it firsthand. From that time on, I understood the origins of the Jerk vs. Nice Guy battle.

Readers may be asking themselves, “What in the world is this guy talking about?” Well, I’m referring to the widely known fact that women habitually date men that are jerks while the “nice” guys are often left twiddling their thumbs in solitaire. Does this sound familiar to anyone?

Figuratively speaking, in order for a man to enjoy the company of women and be able to seduce them, his inner nice guy must first die through heartache. It is at this point that his inner bad boy surfaces and goes on the prowl.

Surprisingly science is beginning to support the case as well:

Researchers at New Mexico State University in Las Cruces gave 200 college students personality tests to see how many of what psychologists call “dark triad traits” they possessed. These traits include callousness, impulsive behavior, extroversion, narcissism and various other anti-social traits for which “bad boys” are known.

The researchers also asked about the student’s sex lives, their feelings about sexual relationships, their number of sexual partners, and what they are seeking in sexual or romantic relationships.

According to Peter Jonason, lead study investigator, although society tends to look down upon these “negative” dark triad personality traits, there seems to be quite an upside to being a bad boy.

“We would traditionally consider these dark triad traits to be adverse personality traits, and we think women would avoid these kinds of men, but what we show is counterintuitive — that women are attracted to these bad boys and they do pretty well in terms of sheer numbers of sexual partners,” Jonason explained.

Jonason compared the type of “dark triad bad boy” that the study refers to as a modern-day James Bond figure — a man with little empathy for others, a penchant for fast cars and even faster women, and a seeker of short-term rather than long-term goals — especially concerning the opposite sex.

This point is validated with a comparison to the popular VH1 show “The Pick-Up Artist,” wherein nerdy, nice guys meet with a typical bad boy to learn how to pick up more of these dark triad traits — and also more women.

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