Vices are Killing Your Game – Alcohol


Alcohol is wonderful! It lowers inhibition, increases self confidence and relaxes. Typically used in and easily obtained in copious quantities just about anywhere social interactions occur. It’s been a part of human society since the ancient times and even animals have sought it out for its effects.

Lots-o-Booze

On the flip side it’s expensive, unhealthy in large quantities, addictive, leads to poor judgement and been the cause of much destruction. Any ex-alcoholic can tell you the lives it’s ruined and economists the real costs to society.

So you may ask, where do I stand?

Let’s first break down the different ways I see alcohol affects you in a negative sense. While I’m not trying to vilify, we all know the reasons people joyously or not so joyously drink.

Mental: “I just need a little buzz before we….”

How many times has yourself or a friend uttered these words?

  • You’re in a great venue with an awesome crowd, surrounded by positive energy yet can’t jump in without a quick drink? You need your “liquid courage” before really settling in.
  • You’re planning a night on the town with friends but want to pre-party to get properly hyped before going out?
  • There is a lull or moment of awkwardness in your night and you run to the bar to grab a refill?
  • You feel you aren’t nearly as cocky, confident or funny sober and need to drink before and during a date, party, get-together, etc to be the best you?

All these are common reasons we drink and unfortunately what started as an occasional beer or shot for celebration has now become a relied upon vice necessary before giving yourself permission to be social.

What are the obvious buzzed game benefits?

  • You lose some approach anxiety
  • Can be more outgoing
  • Less affected by rejection
  • Additional confidence
  • Engaging in a social ritual

What are the sober game advantages?

  • More Focus
  • Clear Mind
  • Higher Standards
  • You articulate better
  • Quicker witty responses to shit tests
  • Faster and better results
  • Two steps ahead of everyone in a drunk club
  • Money savings
  • Healthier
  • No hangovers
  • Total recall
  • and more….

As you can see, and many physicians and psychologists agree, the assumed benefits of alcohol are nothing but an illusion and always a crutch. A large majority of PUA instructors preach sober game and there is good reason.

Return of Kings says:

 

Now for what I believe is the most important part of sober game. When I first started going out and getting my first kisses and make outs and slight successes, I loved it. However, I was always drunk. I felt like alcohol was my crutch. And truth is, for many guys, if not most, it is.

I wanted to be able to do the same thing, sober. Being able to make out with a girl I just met minutes ago sober was a challenge for me already. After a tough learning curve in getting used to the night environment sober, I eventually accomplished that goal. Then, I imagined myself pulling and getting a one night stand. I had never had one before, and if I could do it sober, I would be proud of myself. Once I did that, I felt a very strong high after my achievement.

Which brings me to my next point, inner game. I believe attaining success with women without requiring alcohol, and being in a sober state builds deep confidence. Not the type you choose to exhibit, or are aware of. Ever since I started to become really comfortable going out sober, I’ve had more people respond to me. Guys avoid eye contact and look down, girls show more interest and shyness. Also have had some very direct compliments from girls I had not been accustomed to:

“I figured out why I’m so awkward around you. You’re so confident with yourself it is intimidating.”

On the other hand, success with women while drunk builds drunk confidence. A buddy of mine is great with girls. He doesn’t get needy, teases, escalates, and shows some ‘natural’ qualities. Problem is, he can only do this drunk. When he is sober, or only one or two drinks in, he is like a scared rabbit. This doesn’t mean everyone only has drunk confidence, but this is widely the case. Roosh has mentioned the following before in his book Day Bang:

“The average man will die before doing a cold approach while sober.”

I also wanted to feel in the same state all the time. If I was out during the day on my university campus in between studying and lecture and I saw an attractive girl sitting by herself reading a book on a bench, I wanted to know I could do well, because I do great in the exact same state at just a different time of day. It’s not as difficult to integrate day approaches into your life when you approach at night in the same state you are in all the time.

Cost: Alcohol can be expensive!

I’ve been drinking for the better part of a decade. As I’ve matured, the quantity and quality have steadily increased to the point where it’s good money being thrown away.

In 2012 I spent $1,500 on alcoholic beverages in bars and clubs with the exception of an occasional appetizer.

While this doesn’t sound huge it doesn’t include alcohol bought at convenience and liquor stores for pre-partying, stocking my local stash nor the resulting associated greasy food and cigarettes. This in itself amounts to roughly $1,900.

Wow! Added up I spent $3,400 on alcohol or something directly related to the consumption of it.

Being conservative and saying it averaged $2,500 annually over the past decade  I’m looking at $25,000 spent on alcohol over the course of a decade!

That’s crazy! The first question I have is did I get a similar return on investment compared to say putting this money towards paying off a house, buying stock or socking it away into retirement? Absolutely not! While I’m sure fun times and entertainment were had and may even been directly responsible for a few notches, I can equally say it was the reason I missed out on other perhaps better opportunities.

Without looking at any other pros and cons this alone for someone fiscally responsible should be a huge red flag. I’ll honestly say it was unreal when I came to this realization.

Another major expense many fail to consider are the costs if one were to get a DUI. While the legal situation is worrying enough, the included financial burden is equally chilling. Lets look at the cost of a first time DUI into the overall cost of alcohol. The below image shows that in Oregon a DUI will run you $9,000 for a first offense.

dui-cost

Generally speaking using the above figures with one DUI before learning your lesson and over a decade of drinking, we’re looking at a whopping $34,000. No Thanks!

Risk: Do you feel lucky punk?

We’ve already gone into the obvious negatives of getting caught for a DUI. Assuming you either don’t care of the cost, feel immune or are a good drunk driver how risky can it be?

Yes, you’re the perfect driver when buzzed. You’re as careful, focused and serious driving in an inebriated state as when stone cold sober. Great! Have you ever had been pulled over driving in the past sober? Yes, we all have. With alcohol on your breath you’ve now given the officer instant additional suspicion that could lead to a field sobriety test that you may or may not pass.

I’ve had a few sobriety tests in the past. Fortunately I passed them with flying colors and never had a resulting ticket due to the original infraction I was pulled over for. Could I have passed a breathalyzer?  I would hope so, but can I be sure? Is it something I want to risk again in the future? Do you feel lucky punk? Not a chance.

Finally, assuming you’re never too drunk to fail a test, what happens if there is an accident at no fault of your own? Late at night people are drunk, stupid and generally reckless. Lets say someone hits your car, a pedestrian jumps in front of it and is hurt or one of any dozens of possibilities. If you’re drunk, buzzed and/or over the limit even at no fault of your own, you are now guilty of at the very least intoxication and worse manslaughter.

Where do I stand?

Throughout my adult life alcohol has had a pretty important role. It was with me through the celebrations of success and the lowest of lows. In my head it made me more entertaining, interesting, funny and a better version of myself. It became a vice to a crutch to a possible addiction of sorts. When looking at the big picture I realize it is caused more harm and near misses then good and it’s time for me grow up and us apart.

While I won’t be giving it up entirely… for the sake of my health, wallet and personal growth it’s taking a break.

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